thoughts

So lately I have been doing a lot of thinking about ......well...any and everything. I know that last time I wrote about wanting a boyfriend but honestly I am so not ready. I am not truly comfortable with me and I sure can't seem to get a handle on my ever changing emotions. Why is it that the hardest person to get along with is yourself. You always seem to judge yourself harder than anyone. I finally realize that I have let myself down with some of the decision i have made in my life. I have lied to my self in order to spare the feelings of others.
But no longer will that happen..(well it will take time but atleast I've started) Its okay to be awkward and to not always fit in as long as I am true to myself!

uncried tears....unspoken words: "Where's my script?"

You ever feel like you where living in a movie and you were the only one without the script? Well thats me right now, the things happening around me seem straight off the screen. This movie is obviously a romance chick flick, everyone around me seem to be blissfully inlove and it all happened in an instant. And well.....I have noone. I didn't really feel the need or want for anyone untill now. All the people around them must have a director coaching them in what to do and say to make the magic work, but where is mine. Everywhere I go I see hand holding, kissing , the token "I love you" being spoken with perfect timing and emotion. And all I have is nerves and insecurity. I mean I think I want someone to past the time with, to share a laugh with, or even something as cliche as walk along the beach and enjoy a sunset or two. But I'm for sure that I am not ready for a "BOYFRIEND". I guess I kinda feel like an extra in life. Maybe just once I would want to be the leading lady or even her sidekick. haha! I have some ideas for a leading man but you will just have to wit for that information.

Grab a ticket and get in lne for the ride!!lol

Hello out there to any one who is willing to read this! I am a young woman with so much on my mind that I need a place to put them until I have time to deal. Lets see....I'm a 22yr old single mother to a beautiful 18mo baby girl. I love my daughter but it gets hard sometimes. And her father .......well thats a whole nother story in itsself. So to be completely honest I just need this "space "to vent the stresses of the day, and to anounce the joys of my life. So here I am right now inviting you on this ride with me...hold on its going to be interesting.